An Oregon man on honeymoon in Miami took a selfie with a shark – and didn’t live to tell the tale.
James Crowlett, a 34 year old life insurance salesman, died in grisly fashion after his right leg was eaten by the subterranean beast. Local lifeguards got him onto a boat and took him to shore, but he died of massive blood loss before an ambulance could take him to the emergency room of the South Miami Hospital.
But not before his final selfie was automatically posted on his Facebook page. Many of James’s friends seemed to assume the photo was a joke, unaware of the carnage about to ensue. Two of his ex-girlfiends liked the post. One of his friends commented: ‘Watch out for that great white shark! Lol!’
‘He was worried he might have caught a disease from the shark,’ said an eyewitness. ‘His wife told him to shut up about diseases. She said it was worse than that, he was going to die on his honeymoon! He started jabbering about whether they would get a life insurance pay out or not. His phone kept flashing and vibrating, distracting him. His selfie was getting a lot of attention on Facebook.’
“It was a beautiful day, there was not a cloud in sight, how could this all go so wrong?” said James’s mother, who was relaxing in Miami’s Magic City Casino at the time of the attack. “My baby is gone forever.”
“It was his dream to come back to Florida one day and visit Disney World again, as he had done when he was 4 years old” explained his mother. “I’m just glad he had a chance to live his dream before he left this world.”
Lyle Plovett of the Shark Conservation Society says that humans have massacred approximately 17 million sharks in the past year alone – an ‘intra-species genocide’ – while in that time sharks have only nibbled on a handful of humans.
“You will find that the numbers are well and truly skewed against sharks,” said Plovett.
“Usually sharks eat seals. They don’t care for human flesh. That is what makes this incident so special.”
Latest posts by Baxter Dmitry (see all)
- Huma Abedin Defends Anthony Weiner’s Taste In Underage Girls - March 27, 2017
- Mississippi Bans Sanctuary Cities - March 27, 2017
- Sadiq Khan, London’s ‘Liberal Muslim’ Mayor, Has Ties To ISIS - March 27, 2017