Shaq: ‘The Earth Is Flat’

Shaquille O'Neal has become the latest celebrity to join the flat-earth society, declaring that our minds have been manipulated to accept "the lie that the earth is round."

Shaquille O’Neal has become the latest celebrity to join the flat-earth society, declaring that our minds have been manipulated to accept “the lie that the earth is round.” The big man even offered “proof” of his claims – he “drives coast to coast” and “this sh*t is flat to me.”

Shaq, speaking on his podcast this week, was dismissive of any evidence that proves the earth is round.

When satellite imagery that shows the earth is round was brought up, Shaq immediately threw the evidence out of court, saying “Oh, satellite imagery — that could be drawn or made up.

It’s true. The Earth is flat. The Earth is flat. Yes, it is. Listen, there are three ways to manipulate the mind — what you read, what you see and what you hear. In school, first thing they teach us is, ‘Oh, Columbus discovered America,’ but when he got there, there were some fair-skinned people with the long hair smoking on the peace pipes. So, what does that tell you? Columbus didn’t discover America.

“So, listen, I drive from coast to coast, and this s*** is flat to me. I’m just saying. I drive from Florida to California all the time, and it’s flat to me. I do not go up and down at a 360-degree angle, and all that stuff about gravity, have you looked outside Atlanta lately and seen all these buildings? You mean to tell me that China is under us? China is under us? It’s not. The world is flat.”

Yahoo Sports reports: Cleveland Cavaliers star Kyrie Irving was the first NBA player to reveal his flat-Earth beliefs, summarized as such: “Can you really think of us rotating around the sun, and all planets align, rotating in specific dates, being perpendicular with what’s going on with these ‘planets’ and stuff like this?

Soon afterwards, Denver Nuggets wing Wilson Chandler and Golden State Warriors forward Draymond Green endorsed Irving’s flat-Earth theory, with the latter explaining away NASA’s photos of the planet from space by suggesting everyone can manipulate doctored photos of the globe on their phones.

The NBA storyline became so outrageous commissioner Adam Silver had to address it in his annual state-of-the-league address at the All-Star Game, clarifying, “I believe the world is round,” and suggesting Irving was making some broader social commentary about fake news in this country.

Which, no he wasn’t. Irving doubled down on his flat-Earth theory this past week, before detailing his lucid dreaming skills and informing us how an ex-teammate came to him in a dream to say goodbye.

These are all very real things that NBA players have said.

This is one wild theme to the 2016-17 NBA season, and Shaq just made it wilder when asked about Irving’s flat-Earth theory on his podcast. This was his response, through a series of interruptions:

This man has a doctorate degree in education from Barry University in Miami, Fla. Seriously.

I’m not sure which detail I enjoyed better — Shaq thinking the world is flat because he drives coast to coast or Shaq thinking he’d be driving “up and down at a 360-degree angle” if the Earth was spherical.

Unfortunately, you can’t drive from here to Asia, but there are things called boats and airplanes, and if you head west from California, you’ll arrive in China. And if you head west from there, you’ll eventually end up in California again. Because we live on a globe. Shaq should know full well. He’s been to China.

And, technically, a 360-degree angle is just a circle. I don’t know why Shaq thinks you would be driving up and down on a circle, but it is possible to drive comfortably on a spherical object when that object’s circumference is 24,901 miles. Think of an ant walking around a basketball, if you will. It might think it’s moving in a straight line, but eventually it will navigate the orb and arrive in the same place.

Also, there are things called mountains, and you drive over them on your way to California. At various angles. But never at a 360-degree angle, because your car would just be careening in circles into a ravine. But we shouldn’t have to explain mountains to you, just how we shouldn’t have to tell you the Earth is not flat. And that’s what’s so great about this new NBA narrative. It raises so many questions, from where players think the sun goes at night to why they believe they travel to different time zones.

Baxter Dmitry

Baxter Dmitry

Baxter Dmitry is a writer at Your News Wire. He covers politics, business and entertainment. Speaking truth to power since he learned to talk, Baxter has travelled in over 80 countries and won arguments in every single one. Live without fear.
Email: baxter@yournewswire.com
Follow: @baxter_dmitry
Baxter Dmitry
  • Ted Maul

    thats one dumb n…..

  • Arno van Harskamp

    http://imgur.com/gallery/LP6pPqY
    For anyone in doubt, wanting to do a group experiment 😉

  • isheamonkey

    is it wrong to call him a dumb nigger?….. is the nigger word still on the “don’t use “list” ?.. a horse a horse my kingdom for a horse……lolol…. HE IS VERY MONKEY LOOKING ISNT HE… can he say the complete alphabet?….. hmmm

  • Ralf Yuri

    “Create an absurd conspiracy theory, thus disqualifying all others.”
    Satan servants are so smart.
    Do not forget, the great conspiracy is; Satan redrawing humanity to enslave it with NWO.
    We should be wary of anyone who says to fight satan but does not do so in the name of Jesus.

  • mike

    give a scientific proof that the earth is flat, not round like a ball

    • Gunner12R

      You prove its round.. Its flat! You believe shit you been told that you don’t understand and can’t explain.

      • Arno van Harskamp

        Get some friends and prove it to yourself using this method: http://imgur.com/gallery/LP6pPqY
        All that’s required is a phone or other type of cam and a compass (for alignment of the phone).

      • Bill Graper

        The Earth is just as round as all of the other planets.

    • Anthony Zamora

      give a scientific proof the world is a ball besides the two Nasa cgi models that r clearly thrown out the window. Its all really simple once you do your research i mean its actually quite embarrassing once u see the truth because no wants to admit they have been lied to by r own government and scientists. But when u dig up the dirt that they have buried your mind in u will begin to see right through all their lies and if that isnt the most rewarding eye opener i dont know what is. Here is a easy fact that u can check yourself nasa and their scientists say there is 8in of curvature to every mile now i dont know about u but that right there just debunks the whole ball theory and that is just a teaser of the truth.

  • SpidermanVitamin

    Lol Shaq. I thought you was dumb before. And then you had to go and open your mouth.

    • Zoe

      Better to be thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.

  • Chris Race

    Hey Shack maybe if you talk about Flat Earth we’ll forget your love of pizza…

    We will not forget

  • ranterator

    Some people are still living like it 999!

  • Jimmy

    Please Shaq,this is not a reality you know first hand.
    Proof,it is easy to make someone believe what ever you want them to believe.Even if the earth is flat it is not a reality he has first hand experience with.

  • G.N.M.

    “Like a tale told by an Idiot, full of sound and fury and signifying nothing,” Macbeth, Act 5, scene 5.