Trump Gets Millions Of Obese American Women To Exercise Again

The United States has the dubious distinction of being the eighth most obese nation in the world, but Trump is set to make America slim again

On the same day Trump rolled back Obamacare, his new plans had millions of women pounding the pavement and burning calories.

On the same day Trump rolled back Obamacare, his new plans had millions of women pounding the pavement, burning calories, improving their waistlines and lowering their risk of cardiovascular disease.

The third week of the year is known to be the time most people let their New Years resolutions slide, but millions of American women powered through that sticking point, proving that Trump is going to make America slim again.

Washington D.C. was jam-packed with active women from the early hours of the morning, with many donning trainers, pink beanies and sportswear. Others headed downtown on foot, rollerblades and bicycles, with many having travelled through the night to get started at the crack of dawn.

In particularly enthusiastic corners of the march, the police got their mace out and many of the women performed interval training in the form of short sprints – a well known natural growth hormone booster that burns fat and promotes youthfulness.

Feminist icon Gloria Steinem had a message for the marchers: “Make sure you introduce yourselves to each other and decide what we’re going to do tomorrow, and tomorrow and tomorrow. And we’re never turning back!”

Steinam’s advice corresponds with fitness industry recommendations. According to WebMD: “When your inner demons order you to hit the couch instead of the treadmill, a workout partner can steer you back in the right direction. Studies show you’ll also work out longer when you have a pal along.

The United States has the dubious distinction of being the eighth most obese nation in the world, but that is set to change on Trump’s watch.

However as impressive as the weekend’s turnout was, it should not be forgotten that it was dwarfed by the 30 million women who marched to the polls on November 7 and cast ballots for Trump.

Baxter Dmitry

Baxter Dmitry

Baxter Dmitry is a writer at Your News Wire. He covers politics, business and entertainment. Speaking truth to power since he learned to talk, Baxter has travelled in over 80 countries and won arguments in every single one. Live without fear.
Email: baxter@yournewswire.com
Follow: @baxter_dmitry
Baxter Dmitry
  • herestohim

    Well done Mr Trump… about time all those fat pigs got off their asses and shed a few lbs.. the poor fat slugs would have been a huffin and a puffin…lol… Trump is just naturally effective .. even when he isn’t trying..he is making change inadvertently… well done Donaldo… hehe

    • arielmonserrat

      It isn’t as if there are NO FAT MEN in America, herestohim. The Donald himself could shed a few pounds.
      The biggest problem with the women’s march is that no one knew what they were protesting against.

    • Zaggae

      you’re probably fat yourself and you must be retarded to think this site is real news.

  • Zaggae

    This news site is purely garbage.. referring to the Women’s Day March as Trump getting “obese women to exercise”.. must be an ignorant Trump supporter. Will be doing everything I can to get this site shut down. Fucking loser.